The gems found deep in the cave of discomfort

Voice note: "resistance to discomfort is resistance to your Truth"

There is something your soul, the Universe, Spirit, enter what suits you here: ____, is communicating to you through each situation and internal happening, in this case: internal discomfort, the feeling of “there is something wrong right now.” There is a learning to be found. Will you sit with it? Will you be still and open to let it percolate through your being and stabilize you into a new awareness?

Let’s explore together.

p.s. Yes, I did take out most of the “you knows” from the writing this time around. I know that you know, so it doesn’t have to be transcribed every time.😉And I took out all the “likes” for a smoother read.

Photo by Vizag Explore on Unsplash

You know, there were many times in my life where I was like: “I don’t want to be here anymore.”

Countless times of “I don’t want to be here anymore.”

And of course, that originates from a very, very high degree of discomfort.

When I said I don’t want to be here anymore, I meant like I don’t want to be on earth anymore, I don’t want to be alive in this expereince anymore—it’s just so uncomfortable.

And it’s the realization that it wasn’t so uncomfortable, the very nature of being here. What was so uncomfortable was me restricting and holding onto the baggage that did not allow myself to actually be expressed and be lived as myself.

My life, my life force, my soul, to actually be translated into this physical reality as truly as it is. To the Truth of it—my soul. It was not allowed to come through me because I was not allowing it.

Yes, because of all that pain from the past. Yes, because of all the stuff: all the baggage, all the trauma. Yes, because of all that, and all that pain is real—yes it is. Yes?

But, I have a choice to feel through the discomfort.

I have a choice to feel through discomfort.

And what I find on the other side is yet more and more and more and more of myself. And more of the Truth of me and what wants to come through.

And so literally, pretty much all these videos and all these things I’ve been creating is to get Here. Is to get Here. Is to keep embracing within each and every moment, within each and every breath. Is to build an awareness, is to soften, settle into, surrender into awareness.

There’s this beautiful quote I just found on Instagram, it’s by Bashar [ofc!]

Surrendering is not the giving up of something. True surrender is the total acceptance of yourself. Just be who you are. It will see you through.

Because in all those things we’re holding, in all the difficulty, in all the suffering, in all the commotion the mind likes to get into. (It’s got its reasons). But in all of that, it is the feeding of this pain body, the feeding of this virus inside of each one of us—that keeps us away from really embodying who we are.

Whether that virus is fed through doubt, through excessive consumption. Through subscribing to doubt. Through excessively consuming. Through the attachment to food.

Say, instead of sitting in silence for this moment where you had the opportunity to feel this discomfort, say you decide to, every single time, reach toward some kind of chocolate, some kind of candy, some kind of comfort food.

In reaching of that, every single time, and in feeling numbed out, and in feeling distressed, and in feeling more restless. Clearly, there’s some energy that wants to be felt whenever you go numb or restless.

Either side of the spectrum, there’s something inside you that wants to be felt. And that requires you to be with it, to sit still with it, to feel it through [move with it: let it move within and through you] and surrender it. So it can also empower you into your next step.

This is why I’ve had that pattern of addiction and going towards things of comfort, whether that’s video games, porn, food, what not.

So a lot of the times when I had plant ceremonies, (not that I didn’t meditate other times,) that would be my space in the plant ceremonies to really go into the discomfort cause I didn’t have a way out, I didn’t have an exit plan, I didn’t have the comforts of anything. There were times of extreme discomfort I felt on plant medicines, like nowhere to go but to feel this discomfort.

Discomfort is a sign pointing you towards what it is that you are holding onto that is keeping you stuck to this old timeline, to this old pattern, to this virus inside you that is keeping you stuck in a way from actually embodying all of yourself. All of the things that are telling you that your expression is bad, that you shouldn’t, that you shouldn’t, that you shouldn’t, that’s bad, that’s fear fear fear: stop. All of that, all of that, relating that to Bashar’s quote is the resistance to surrendering to yourself, to your true self, to your soul.

That’s what I wanted to share today.

Thanks for listening.☺️

Photo by Nicholas Fuentes on Unsplash

What cave is there in your internal feeling landscape that has not yet been entered? Not yet felt? Of which you have not yet touched the gems of?

Which cave are you entering?

Which cave have you already found the gems of? What are those gems?

As I share my process, I encourage you to share yours; gems are waiting to be found. And through the sharing, too. You never know who you may reach through your words.